Now I know I can see your light

Dawn breaks; there is blue in the sky.

Your face before me though I dont know why.
Thoughts disappearing like tears from the moon.

Waiting here; as I sit by the stone
They came before me, those men from the sun.
Signs from the heavens say I am the one.

Now I know; I can see your light,
This light that I must follow,
You -- you could take my life away
-- so far away.
Now I know; I must leave your spell
-- I want tomorrow.

Now youre here; I can see your light,
This light that I must follow,
You -- you may take my life away
-- so far away.
Now I know; I must leave your spell
-- I want tomorrow.

Enya - I want tomorrow

I wonder

i din let go, not give up, no stop and didn't wanna stop.  my answer is the same, irrelevant to me.  all those u write is only what u think and those are the part I said I don't agree with what u said.  so there is no way I can answer that nor should I as you already limit and expect something ... from me who totally do no see things the way u wrote.  i didn't say u r wrong, i said its wrong description.  perhaps its time u read 'slowly' and try to get it right the first time, get it the way I write it, instead of repeating reading something I wrote and still get it wrong ( not the way I was sending out the msg ) ... 

24 September 2008   1117  

I miss our old days.  It has been almost two months.  In fact, it was a really short while... 

No matter what you are doing right now, I wish you get to read this and feel happy when you read this, because I wish to let you know that I feel differently now...  I agree to a lot of your points; the thing we seem bad now, might not be bad afterall; and about the self seeking, Im daunting now, it could be really frightening which i had no fear in the past... ; and about the... 

I wonder when would you come to see the difference.  Or you never will...

I wonder if i should tell you my date of arrival.   I wonder if I should just come and go in my  trip without telling you about it.  I wonder if I should only tell you on the spot and be flexible for you could come or not.  I wonder if you will attend the date.  I wonder which date is the best date.  I wonder if you like what I have planned.  I wonder if you want it such a way.  I wonder if I should make you attend the date cos Im hurting P by doing so.  I had a lot of planning for this date earlier on, but today, I only wish to meet you for a meal, thats all about it.  By doing so, I guess I can face P without any guilts, although I will not meet her at all.  

And, I wonder, if you are still around for me.  And then I too wonder, if you are still around, am i capable to want what you can offer afterall?  I wonder.

I know you will reply by giving me a full surprise, including not reply at all, which will not be an answer that I wanted to have, as we always think differently... 

As last, i wonder if this is going to be another blog post that I write for a record and in later days i wish i hadnt written.

Fate or...

- Canal du Midi, Toulouse, France (a UNESCO World Heritage Site) I panic and lost, I feel neglected, I feel insignificant, in short term.

At the very same time:

I feel love and I feel everything else that I wish/want to feel about, and Im eager to find out about future and be a better person for u in future, I'm not lost, I'm significant in seeing everything u do, in long term.

But Im stuck in between two. Either one could be truth.  

Nevertheless, all i ever wanted is to stand by you, no matter what you choose to do, figuring out what do you want, instead of what can i get - a consistent admirer, be there for you.

Im the one who is insignificant in your life. But I plan to do what I want to do.  

I hope FATE give us what I wish this time, as FATE always comes with surprises and I usually hate it, but u love it.  

So, "when two kids are playing, one is always winning, no fun playing anymore..." Im the losing one, not you.

Would you care to find out what you have made me into? What is inside the Pandora box that you opened in me?

I hope u r in town when I touch down in Dec.